A Big Scare- updated!

*** Update at Bottom of Post!! ***

Good Afternoon, it's Aphia here!

Just wanted to tell you about the little scare I gave Mommy and Daddy last night. Mommy was putting my jammies on and I didn't want to get a new diaper on, I love to run around nakie! When she layed me down I started to cry, and then scream! Mommy knows how I can be sometimes, so she didn't really think anything of it. But then something happened... When Mommy looked down I had my mouth open so wide, but no sound or air was moving. I'm not sure if I was so mad that I was holding my breath or what, but Mommy picked me up and said to Daddy, "Jeremiah! She's not breathing!" So Daddy grabbed me and put me on my tummy on his arm so Mommy could see if I was choking on something or what was going on. My eyes started to glaze over and my whole body was rigid. Mommy was right up in my face saying my name and I finally took a small gasp of air. But then my eyes went glazy again and I didn't breath for a couple seconds. Mommy thought it looked something like a seizure, or choking, or something weird that made me look like I was going to pass out. She was saying my name and trying to get me to focus on her, then I took a couple big gasps of air and Mommy took me in her arms. She held me close to her to listen to me breathing. I came out of whatever was keeping me from breathing and I was a little out of it. I just clung to my mommy and she held on tight to me.

It really scared Mommy and Daddy. I'm not sure what was going on, if something physically happened, or if at just shy of 18 months, I know what it is to hold my breath when I'm mad! Mommy says that her gut tells her otherwise... that it was something out of my control, but who knows!

Mommy kept checking on me all night when I was sleeping, even though I agreed that I wouldn't ever do that again. She doesn't get afraid too often or worry too much about Jonah and I, but she was afraid last night and worried too. This fear festered in her for the night, making her mind wander to horrible things, things that no mommy or daddy ever wants to encounter. Since fear isn't something she deals with a whole lot, it seemed to be something that ripped at her heart, almost making it hard for her to breathe. I guess sometimes being a mommy can be really hard. I know that she loves me so much, that it's a whole new realm of fear when you have a baby.

So this morning she went and had her date with Jesus at the coffee shop (which she does once a week now. Not always at the coffee shop, last week she just went and sat my Lake Pulaski) and He pointed out a lot of scripture about not fearing because the Lord is with her. She knows that He's in control and He's SO big! Each time that she goes, God teaches her something new! It's pretty cool.

If you think about it, say a lil prayer that I will never do anything like that again to scare my mom or dad. I don't want them to be afraid like that ever again. I'm back to my bubbly-self today. I was running around with Jonah and his friend Jake at the park today having a grand ol' time! I just laughed and giggled the whole way through!

Hope everyone has a happy Wednesday!

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UPDATE:

We think we have a hold on what's going on. After talking with family and medical personnel we're pretty sure that it's Aphia holding her breath on her own. Rob talked with one of the Pediatricians (the same doctor that took care of Jonah while in the ICN in Willmar) he works with and he said that it's not uncommon for children Aphia's age to hold their breath following an emotional, traumatic, frustrating, or anger inducing experience. It can be both a consious and subconsious doing on her part- meaning she may not realize what she's doing at this point, but it's generally an attention getting ploy. They realize that when this happens they get big-time attention from mom and/or dad and that's what they want. The best way to treat it, is to ignore it. At 18 months... not so sure that I can do that. If it were Jonah, I know I could, he's older and I can reason with him (maybe that's why HE doesn't hold his breath!!). I'm going to do my best to give her the attention she needs and wants when she's acting in positive ways and not feed into giving attention over negative actions on her part. It will be tough, but I'm tougher :)

Our mom went to her 10 year High School Reunion a couple weeks ago and had a great time! The girls all met at Trang's house first and then went on a boat on the Mississippi. Here are all the girls, all dolled up. Back: Molly, Trang, Mandy, Mommy, Melissa. Front: Shauna, Holli, Missy.
Here they are in front of the Paddleford Boat, it was a bit windy!
Here's Mommy and Molly- they have been friends for 25 years!! They met when they were 3 and have stayed constant friends ever since! Molly was in Mommy and Daddy's wedding!
And to top of Shauna's visit from Seattle, they all met at Pittsburgh Blue for dinner on the Tuesday after the reunion for one last time together. Daddy had prime rib and Mommy had filet mignon. They said it was outstanding- being the beef lovers they are!
Back row: Mike Moeller (Trang's husband), Daddy, Shan (Shauna's husband), Craig (Melissa's husband), Melissa
Front row: Trang, Mommy, Mandy, Shauna, Holli, Missy
Missing: Adam (Mandy's husband) who was there for a bit, but had to go back to work, and Molly

"Forchuly" Baby!

My Great Auntie Mary posted a blog about her grandfather (so my great-great grandfather) who came over to America from Finland to dodge the draft into the Russian army. He was a communist and a draft dodger, but he loved America. She has a picture of him in the Kingston City Band celebrating, "Forchuly"- that's how he'd say it with his thick Finnish accent. His legacy of love for this country has been passed on. Here I am sporting my Red, White and Blue and waving my little flag on Forchuly.

My brother was being grumpy and would not pose for a picture, whining because the sun was in his eyes. But I was being a good girl and posed so nice. I'm proud to be an American and thankful for my independence and freedom.

Hope everyone had a wonderful Forchuly :)

Today is no longer yesterday

Jonah here!
Yesterday was not one of my mom's finest moments as a mom. We had had a rough morning, but at lunch mommy prayed for patience for her and for obedience for me and Phia. The rest of the afternoon was really fun. Mom and I read books and played cars and trains while Phia was napping. She even watched little people with me while I snuggled on her lap!
But then we went to Target around 5:00 to try to distract me and Phia until Daddy got home and it was finally dinner time. Well I wasn't listening so well at Target and Mommy said that I had to have a spanking when we got home. I was pretty sad about this and thought that if I minded really well for the rest of the time I wouldn't have to have a spanking, but she said I still did. We talked about my behavior and how it wasn't good or obedient.
Then afterwards I was still acting really whiney and Mommy got really upset. She says that she "lost her temper, really bad." I'm not sure what that is or where it went, but if it was something to lose that makes you mad, it's long gone, because she was really mad. She was not being the mommy that she wants to be and it made me pretty sad, Phia too. Afterwards she was really upset with herself and how she had acted. She said that she had a "mommy temper tantrum" and said that if it's not ok for me to act that way, then it's not ok for her either.

She decided this morning to get up at 6:30 and have a date with Jesus at Coffee Connection. In the car, on her way, there was a song on the radio that had the words, "Be still and know I am God." She said, "Ok Lord, it always comes back to that huh? OK! I'm here, I'm still, I'm listening." The next song that came on the radio had the words, "There is no guilt here, there is no shame, no pointing fingers, there is no blame. What happened yesterday has disappeared, the dirt has washed away and now it's clear... There's only grace, there's only love, there's only mercy and believe me it's enough. Your sins are gone without a trace, there's nothing left now, there's only grace." Mommy couldn't believe her ears, well actually she could, she knows how God works sometimes. He spoke directly to people like Moses, but that's only because they hadn't thought up radios yet! So Mommy cried a lot then and knew that God's mercy and forgiveness were even enough for her.

Mommy and Jesus sat outside and watched the morning open up. She read scripture and wrote in her journal (something she'd really been missing since it had been packed up and at Granny's house). Mommy read a lot about God's grace and His mercy. She read about the characteristics that she wants to have as a mommy and a wife and as a child of God. It was a really good morning for her and it has helped today go much smoother so far. She's praying a lot for patience and self-control in this area. She knows it's a constant work in progress, but she says that I'm worth it to work at! I'm trying hard to be a good boy for her and act like a big 3 and a 1/2 year old. I'm working on obeying her and listening to what she says. Sometimes it's hard for me to be quiet because I like to talk SO MUCH! But sometimes Mommy needs a little bit of quietness so she can think. Please pray for us all, that we can continue to be a loving family.
Love, Jonah

Naptime is tough to rouse out of

My mom thought that she should wake me up one day so that I wouldn't be so much trouble putting to bed that night. I however, had other ideas. I figured if she got me up and I couldn't sleep in my bed, then I'd just sleep on the kitchen floor.